Thursday, July 4, 2024

Harvey Fierstein to Donate Vocal Chords to Broadway

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American Theater hall of famer Harvey Fierstein has declared he will be auctioning off his vocal chords to a charity founded to save the ever-dying Broadway.

This decision has come in a time of crisis, but Fierstein claims it has always been on the table for him. Like many other’s, Fierstein is in constant fear that the stage is doomed. In a world where digital content and virtual reality are more prevalent than ever, some still can’t shake the dread that Broadway’s days are numbered.

“It’s time I did something to give back” Fierstein told us. “My countless performances and books I have written will never be enough to keep this dying industry afloat. All these years I thought I was giving myself up to the stage, but until I donate my physical body I truly haven’t done anything.”

Fierstein’s iconic voice has evoked laughter for decades. From his performances is The Torch Song Trilogy, Hairspray, and of course the beloved Mrs. Doubtfire. It is said his recognizable voice could garner up to 100 million dollars at auction. The plans for what will be done with the organ once accrued are undecided. Will they simply be on display? Will they be surgically transferred into an up and coming talent for preservation? Or will they be sold to an anonymous billionaire for undisclosed purposes.

It is a shame the legend feels the necessity of this drastic action and that he alone must should the burden of Broadway. In the 2018-2019 season Broadway was seeing its best numbers of all time grossing $1,829,000,000 with over 14 million in attendance. Alas there are still those whole will continue to perpetuate the notion that Theatre is on life support and each coming show could be its last.

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